Women CAN Have It All

These are our sons, C (3)  & J (18 M)

This is me (post children!) and my wonderful hubby

Anne-Marie Slaughter recently wrote in The Atlantic an article, which received a ton of press (good and bad) entitled, Why Women Still Can't Have It All. Although Slaughter's article was extremely well composed and took a lot of courage on her part, considering she is a proclaimed and esteemed Feminist icon, being a full-time working mother of two young sons, and let's not forget a wife, I disagreed with the main point behind Slaughter's article:

"The women who have managed to be both mothers and top professionals are either super human, rich or self-employed."

It's true, American society places a ridiculous standard on women, especially on women with children. For example, we live in the most obese country in the world, and yet if a woman is carrying a little extra weight after having a baby, she is labeled as fat, or worse, inferior to her counterparts.

It's also true that women place a high standard on each other. We are constantly comparing ourselves to the woman in front of us, behind us, beside us, above us or below us. We will get much further if we put all our differences of opinion aside and stick together. Obviously.

I'm here before you today to proclaim becoming a mom doesn't mean you have to sacrifice your...

• Dreams of having a career. You can. Slaughter proclaims in her article, extremely well, that it's OK to take "investment intervals" throughout the life of your career to take care of your children and be the best mother you can possibly be. The heavy burdens of child rearing are short-lived and once they're gone, they're gone. You don't get that time back. You have plenty of time to climb the ladder once your kids are off to college. And better yet, women now more than ever are having fantastic encore careers in our retirement years. So hang in there, mama. Your time will come if you want it! Don't ignore your feminine aspects!
• Body. My father always told me "you are in control of you". If you eat chocolate chip cookies everyday while pregnant, you're going to get fat and stay fat. Sorry if that's too blunt or offensive, but I speak truth here. Also, just because you are pregnant, doesn't mean you are not able bodied. Most doctors will encourage light-to-moderate exercise, good nutrition, supplements and lots of water consumption. Post bab(ies) I am 20 pounds lighter than pre-pregnancy weight. If I can do it, so can you.
• Marriage. Having children is earth-shattering and life changing. Anyone who tells you otherwise is lying. However, as long as you're with the right person, and/or you've chosen the right partner, having children should bring you closer together, not drive you apart.

I am a self (and several others) proclaimed SuperMom. And guess what? I'm not rich, super-human or self-employed. Stick with me, you can get there too!

Cheers, NCB 

And So It Begins...

Welcome to WhoLey NicoLey.

Prior to starting I have to give a thank you to the people that believed in me enough to inspire me to begin this journey: A. Archer, A. (DeVaan) Sellers, you have been friends of mine for so long and remain dear to my heart always.

... "You are SuperMom"... said a friend to me recently. "You have to start a blog and keep it focused on the whole food kick, working out and fitness stuff. Mom's will eat this stuff up."

And so, here we are.

I am making a commitment to blog every Monday, Wednesday and Friday/Saturday/OR Sunday evenings. All my posts are dedicated to mothers all around the world, however, I'm sure that anyone will find the information presented useful.

My goal is to inspire others to want to live a better life. I recently told a close friend that life is too short. If you're unhappy with aspects in your life, change them. If you want to go somewhere, go. If you dream of doing this or doing that, do this or that.

Here's to leaving all excuses behind and stepping forward with the best foot possible.

Cheers, NCB